In your dating app journey, after a whole lot of swiping, you eventually find that profile that just clicks with you. You love their picture, their bio is short and interesting, and you want to get to know them better. It is time to get over the next hurdle, the chat.
Online chatting now has become a primary way of connecting with other people, through dating apps, instant messaging, email, or text. But it can be difficult to know how to start chats now, how to sustain the conversation, and how to make a lasting first impression that will get you that date.
Online conversation skills are hard to build, and many people now chat awkwardly, making their partners cringe. Your match may just be desperate for a stimulating chat among all the junk out there, and if you can provide it, you will be on your way to getting your date.
We have put together some expert tips to get the awkwardness out of the way and have you chatting now with confidence and skill.
Tips To Get You Chatting With Confidence Immediately
The process of online chats now generally follows three main phases. First, the icebreaker. Next, the conversation, and finally, the sign-off. Here are our tips for the best chatting experience.
- Just Do It!
Nike got it spot on with this one. You sometimes spend a lot of time agonizing over whether to message that cute guy or girl you met online that you give yourself enough time to chicken out.
Our first tip for you is to just do it. Pick a convenient time when you’re both online and have nothing on and send a “Hey there, how are you doing?”
- Break the Ice
So, you slid into their DM’s and sent that “Hi”, what next? Well, you want to break the ice with some easy conversation starters. If it's a person you share something with IRL lead with that, for example, “Did you catch the professor's assignment? I wasn’t paying attention”.
For someone you are meeting for the first time online, our tip is to ask about something on their profile, if their bio says they love Bobby Brown you can ask what their favorite song of His is.
- Would You Rather
Playing Would You Rather is a fun icebreaker and conversation opener. It gets the awkwardness of being strangers out of the way and lets you know about the person you are chatting to.
And if they’d rather have a pet pig than a billion dollars, well, thats good to know.
- Ask Open Ended Questions
Asking open-ended questions is the key to sustaining meaningful conversations online. Questions like “What does an ideal day look like for you?” will get a thoughtful and interesting response that will open doors to other conversation topics.
Avoid asking yes or no questions as those can kill a conversation very quickly.
- Turn Your Answers Into Questions
This is very good for keeping a conversation going, don’t just answer “How was your day?” with “It was terrible I almost died a couple of times” follow up with “And how was your day, I’m sure it was just as eventful”.
This allows your match to share something with you and lets the conversation flow smoothly.
- Ask What They are Looking For
This is especially important for dating apps, after breaking the ice and establishing some rapport it is good you determine if your intentions match so you don’t end up wasting each other's time.
Ask questions like, “So, what brings you to the dating app world?” or “Are you looking for something casual or long-term?”. Depending on their answer you’ll then know how to proceed.
- Be Honest About Yourself
When your match asks you questions about yourself, do not go on and on or make things up to impress them. That will just bore them and lies will eventually backfire.
Our tip, be honest. Briefly and honestly answer their questions, resist the urge to brag. Of course, you shouldn’t give too many details about yourself to a stranger.
- Go Deeper
After some small talk to get comfortable, it’s time for some deeper questions to really get to know your match. This may not happen during your first or second chat as not everyone is comfortable discussing personal stuff with strangers.
Questions like “Does your life right now line up with your childhood dreams?” or “if you could change anything in your life right now, what would it be?” help you get to know the person you are chatting to, from their childhood experiences to their hopes and dreams.
- Don’t Be Pushy
If you are getting one-word answers, late replies, or other signs that a person is not interested in the conversation at that time, it's best to back off. They may be dealing with some issues at the moment, be at work or busy.
Try again at another time when you are both online, if this happens multiple times, they may just not be interested and that is okay, you can try again with someone else.
- Make a Date
Ideally, you should keep chatting until you run out of topics, if you have to go you can sign off with, “Hey, really enjoyed talking to you. I have to get to soccer practice now but we should do this again sometime”.
If you have had a great conversation and would like to meet IRL then ask. “You seem cool and I’d like to get to know you better off the app if you’re game”. You could also exchange numbers and call.
Conclusion
Chatting, generally, is awkward for everyone. It is a lot more difficult to gauge moods and people's responses to what you say than when talking face-to-face. But online chat now has come to stay and more people are meeting their partners online than ever before.
So, get in the groove, take that first step, and engage. Don’t be a pervert and try to sex chat now on your first meeting, there will be time for that later if things go well. Try to establish a connection, really get to know the other person, and get a physical meeting set up if possible.
There are a lot of sites that offer services to help you chat free now, but one that stands out is Woodate.com with over 2000 users around the world enjoying anonymous messaging services that delete sensitive chats after 24 hours.
Woodate also offers advanced algorithms for optimal matches based on your selected preferences. You can be sure you’ll have an interesting time. Hurry and sign up now for an unbeatable dating experience.
FAQ’s
How should I handle people who are uninterested in chatting?
If someone seems uninterested, don’t take it personally. Try to ask more engaging or varied questions, and if there’s still no improvement, it might be best to end the conversation and move on.
What are some common mistakes to avoid when chatting online for dating?
Avoid coming on too strong, oversharing personal details too soon, or asking overly intrusive questions. Also, be mindful of spelling and grammar as they can impact first impressions.
How can I ensure safety while chatting online for dating?
Avoid sharing sensitive personal information such as your home address or financial details. Use reputable dating platforms with security features.
How do I transition from an online chat to a face-to-face meeting?
Start by suggesting a casual meet-up based on shared interests discussed during your chats. Propose a specific time and place, and be flexible. Ensure both parties feel ready for the transition to avoid any pressure.
How can I start a conversation in an online dating chat?
Ask open-ended questions related to the other person's interests or profile. Show genuine curiosity. Personalizing your message and showing authentic interest can set a positive tone for the conversation.